Wedding day jitters, butterflies in the stomach, cold feet…
Are these normal things to feel before a wedding? Of course! We all get them! After all, your wedding is not just one of the biggest days of your life, but also the precursor to a new way of life. Read on for some ways for coping with wedding stress and to keep your cool on your Big Day:
The wedding is a huge event that is often the result of months, sometimes years, of preparation and planning. Imagine a pot that has long been simmering and cooking over a small fire. It is bound to eventually reach boiling point! Try not to allow that pot to boil over on the day of your wedding.
Advice on coping with wedding stress
You know your own stressful habits and mannerisms, so if you tend to be explosive, give your wedding party lots of forewarning. It is best they understand beforehand whether to give you lots of attention or to keep their distance in those hours prior to the wedding. If there are a couple of family members or friends who have a calming effect on you, ask them if they’d spend the time before the ceremony to talk or just sit quietly gathering thoughts. Though you might want to stew in your own thoughts, it’s not a good idea to isolate yourself completely.
An interesting idea is to write yourself or your future spouse a letter, explaining your feelings. Then seal the letter and open to read it at a much later time. You’ll probably have a good laugh over the anxiety and wedding stress you once felt!
Learn to delegate tasks and responsibilities for less wedding stress. On your wedding day you should be focused on your own preparations, or trying to relax, instead of hunting for extension cords. Let other people take care of the guest book, wedding gifts, paying the vendors, etc.
If your nerves are truly getting to you, then try these quick wedding stress relievers. Scream into a pillow or cushion- it’s much better than screaming at your mother or bridesmaids! Do a few pushups or jumping jacks (though do watch out if you’re in your wedding attire!). Meditate. Bathe your pulse points- your forehead, temples, inner wrists- with a cold cloth or ice. Fold origami. Repeat a line of a song or poem until it loses meaning and makes you laugh.
The point is to focus your stress and negative thoughts into a mindless task that will keep you from slipping back down that road of negativity, fear or doubt. That’s right, the underlying source of your pre-wedding jitters is always fear. Thus, during the months of wedding preparations, keep in communication with your future spouse, your friends and family. Tell them if you’re worried about something; they’ll be sure to try and help. Don’t speak of your fears with only your spouse as that may lead to escalating tension between the two of you and that’s not what you want before a wedding. For lingering jitters or fears that intensify or won’t go away, consider going to a trusted third party, such as a family member, member of the church, or even a counselor. You should try to figure out the underlying factor(s) that are causing the fear, then work to combat them.
Focus on all the good, loving time with your future spouse. You worked so hard together to plan the wedding, so ask yourself, Why would someone do that if they were not already deeply committed and in love with you? banish any wedding stress! Remember that you are having this wedding together to express and share your love with your closest family and friends. There is nothing to fear…now, go have the best wedding of your life!